Take my Breath
by CassetteTapes
Summary: This is gonna be a multi chapter Basherine story. Set when Bash finds out Christophe is the killer and Catherine knew but didn't say anything. Ok I'm horrid at summaries. Also spoilers for season 3! Rated T for Violence
1. The Secrets we Hold

She entered her chambers and shut the door behind her, the day had been exhausting and her body ached. It didn't help that just the other night Christophe had nearly choked the life out of her. She should've never let him do it, but there was really no other option. She shivered at the remembrance of his cold hands closing around her throat, how her head had spun and she'd fell to the floor. Her fingers unclasped the buttons at the collar of her dress, her neck was red and raw. She titled her head to the side and rubbed the bruises with two fingers. Suddenly the door behind her opened, she removed her hand from her neck and turned around to see Bash.

He went to tell Catherine that he had uncovered more news of the Red Knights, he didn't really know why he was helping her but he felt it was rather his duty. Of course he could've just left her to deal with the threat alone but he had already committed, he reached her chambers and pushed the door open. Catherine spun around to look at him obviously startled "Sorry for bursting in but I had to tell you that I've uncovered more information about the Red Knights."

She nodded, having forgotten that her neck and collarbone were revealed she walked over to him. "What have you learned?" 

"I found out who their leader is, and we might know where he's staying." He suddenly saw the red and purple bruises that lined her pale throat. Hadn't Delphine said something about the killer tightening his hands around a girl's neck? "Catherine what's happened to your neck?!" He suddenly felt an odd sense of concern for her. Had Catherine been attacked by the killer and stayed quiet?!

 _Shoot!_ She thought, she had forgotten that they were there, "Nothing, it's nothing." She turned her back on him, walking towards her desk while buttoning her desk back up. All thought of their previous conversation was gone. She felt his hand grasp hers and she stopped her attempt to cover her neck, slowly she turned around to see a half angry half concerned Bash.

He took her hand and she stopped trying to button her dress back up. She turned to face him, fear flashed through her eyes before she looked at the floor. "Catherine what happened?" He asked again in a stern yet gentle tone.

"I told you it's nothing." She mumbled hoping that by looking down he wouldn't be able to see the marks. Fear was pounding against her chest, he couldn't know what'd happened.

He sighed realizing she'd left him no choice, he folded the collar of her dress down before she could do so much as retort. Now he could see the burgundy bruises that covered her freckled neck and collarbone. They were in the shape of fingers and he knew that she hadn't choked herself because her hands were too small for the size of the bruises. "Who did this to you?" He asked her.

Suddenly he had folded down the collar of her dress and his cold fingers brushed against her bruises, she shivered and flinched away. The mere touch was enough to scare her at the moment, after what Christophe and so many other men had done the slightest touch of her bare neck would strike dread in her body. She quickly side stepped him, unfolded her collar and re-buttoning it as quickly as her small fingers could manage. "I did it to myself." She lied.

"You and I both know that's not true, tell me the truth." He said a little more harshly then he'd intended. He walked towards her as she walked backwards an expression of fear clear on her face. This wasn't like her, he stopped and then sighed "Fine but if I find out it was someone else and you didn't tell me I'll be infuriated." With that he turned on his heel and left her to stare after him, shocked and relieved.

As he backed her into the corner she felt herself cowering down ready for him to lash out at her. She felt unusually vulnerable this was never how she acted, normally she would've slapped him across the face a long time ago. When he turned and left she let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding. Sinking into the chair near her desk she put he head in her hands and took long steady breaths. The sun was setting over the mountains and she stood, walking over to her wardrobe and taking out a lighter dress. She took off her heavy winter dress and let out a sigh, how she hated having to wear that damned thing all day. She then slipped the navy blue dress over her head, it was light, sleeveless and defiantly more comfortable. After hanging up her winter dress she took her robe and put it on, she was just about to sit down and write a letter when the secret passageway creaked open.

She jumped up and grabbed the dagger off her desk, she always kept it there, just in case. You never really could be too safe in French Court, you can't trust anyone they were your friend one minute and the next they'd murdered your entire family. Slowly the passageway creaked open and Christophe stepped through, fear jumped to her heart. She lowered her dagger and set it aside but not out of reach "Christophe, what are you doing here?" Her voice was neutral but fear danced in her eyes.

"I think you very well know.." He hissed.

"I don't." She stated truthfully.

"That fool Sebastian confronted me, accusing me of trying to choke you! I told you that if you told anyone I would kill you." He was inches away from her now.

Her breath hitched, he was going to kill her she was about to scream for the guards when his hands closed around her throat. She paled and struggled to get out of his deathly grasp but he just squeezed tighter and she squeaked. Her lungs gasped for air but there was none and her brain went fuzzy, she couldn't die like this. With the last of the available air she screamed, long and loud before she went limp in his grasp.

He didn't however let go of her neck, he had to make sure she was really dead. Suddenly the door burst open and Bash burst in, Christophe spun to look at him before quickly let go of Catherine. She fell hitting her head on the desk with a sickening crack before lying deathly still on the tile floor.

Bash had been going to his chambers when he heard a high-pitched scream echo from Catherine's chambers. He knew it must be the person who'd hurt her previously, he ran down the hall and burst into the room. What he saw was terrifying, Christophe was holding Catherine by her throat, she was shoved against the wall, pale and lifeless. As soon as the other man realized Bash was present he let go of Catherine who crumbled to the ground. "You monster!" Bash hissed.

Bash took out his sword and pointed it at Christophe who in turn took out his own sword. Instead of pointing it at Bash however he held it over Catherine's head. "Attack me and I kill her, that is if she's not already dead." Bash looked from Christophe to Catherine and slowly lowered his sword.

He knew he couldn't risk Catherine's life, he would get Christophe some other way "Leave and never set hands on her again!" Bash shouted.

Christophe laughed harshly and disappeared through the secret passageway as Bash ran to Catherine. He went to his knees beside her brushing the loose copper curls off her neck, it was dark purple and bright red. She was as pale as a sheet of parchment and crumpled on the floor, limp and lifeless. Not to mention the slow trickle of blood on her forehead, in that moment she looked so fragile, a broken sculpture. Sighing he lifted her into his arms and onto the bed, it was too late for anyone else to still be awake so he decided to tend to her himself. He could see her chest rising and falling weakly, too weakly considering she was loosing blood as well.

He wiped the blood from her forehead and putting fabric on the wound to cease the bleeding, he did however realize her chest was barely moving. He took her hand "Come on Catherine just hold on." He muttered.

Her chest finally stopped moving and a sudden pang of guilt, fear, and desperation leapt inside him. Taking hold her shoulders he began to shake her "Catherine! Catherine! Snap out of it!" He didn't notice the tears welling in his eyes he couldn't lose her. Maybe because he felt responsible, or maybe because he hadn't avenged her, or for other reasons he wouldn't admit. "Catherine please…I'm so sorry.." He murmured, holding her limp figure to his chest.

Suddenly she gasped and threw her arms around him before her head span and she collapsed into his chest. "Bash.." She breathed, trying to regain her breath. Her head was pounding and her neck ached but all she wanted to feel was Bash's heart beating against her cheek. She didn't care who it was but she longed for comfort, how she hated it when she longed for someone's embrace but right now it was all she could hold onto. All she could do was gasp for air and murmur his name repeatedly, she couldn't think, couldn't move, just breathe.

Before he had a chance to do anything she had thrown her arms around him and then fallen back to his chest, her hands clung to his shirt and she just panted, searching for air. "Catherine.." His voice was filled with relief and pain. Slowly he wrapped his arms around her "Shhhh it's okay now, you're okay." She just kept repeating his name in a raspy whisper, he moved his hand up and down her back in attempt to soothe her. It seemed to be working because she hiccupped once before sighing and closing her eyes.

Her thoughts were scattered all she knew was that she was exhausted and someone was holding like she was important. She was probably just tired out of her mind but a part of her was glad it was Bash, and not someone else. Tears were trickling down her cheeks, tears of relief and fear, she didn't make any attempt to stop them. He didn't say anything, didn't ask questions, just held her and rubbed her back. Gradually her breath became even and the tears stopped as her lashes fluttered close. She didn't know if he'd be there in the morning but a small piece of her hoped he would be, with that thought in mind she fell into a heavy sleep.

After an hour he was sure she was sound asleep, he carefully adjusted her so she was laying on the pillow. Then covered her in the blanket, he slowly moved off the bed and was about to turn the doorknob when he looked back at her. Her cheeks had dried tear tracks on them and her nose was slightly red, standing out on her pale face. Her usually tightly imprisoned hair was messy and loose around her shoulders, her neck was covered in bruises and the skin was raw. He could see her collarbone and her dress was just low enough…at that moment he realized he was staring and shook his head. He couldn't leave, Christophe was still roaming free and she had come close to death once already that night. Plus he wouldn't really mind looking at her all night, maybe because it was now he realized she wasn't as cold as he'd always thought, she was a normal human being. With the decision made he sat down in a armchair next to the bed and watched her sleep, finally in peace.


	2. Catch my Breath

The next morning she opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was Bash's icy blue eyes watching her. "Bash?" She murmured, her voice was raspy and her throat burned. The memories of the previous night flowed back and she slowly sat up, all she could remember was after Bash left Christophe had returned. He told her Bash had confronted him and seized her throat, this time with the intention to kill, but he hadn't succeeded. Why though? Had Christophe spared her or had she been rescued? Someone must've heard her scream, yes…now she could remember, it was Bash, she remembered the feel of his arms around her. He had held her, calmed her as she shook and cried, she could still his voice in her ear, telling her it was okay that she was okay. She believed him that it was all okay that she was finally okay, then she'd fallen asleep and he hadn't left her.

 _Oh no!_ If he had rescued her he'd know it was Christophe, which would mean he would ask questions, he would hate her! Well then again who didn't? It was only Bash anyway he didn't mean anything to her did he? No. Most certainly not. Still, he might tell Claude and Charles, great why couldn't she have just died!? That's what everyone wanted after all.

He watched her wake, how her eyes had fluttered open as she yawned and stretched. Then a look of thoughtfulness crossed her face then she looked concerned almost fearful. "What's wrong?" He asked her quietly snapping her out of her trance. Her hazel eyes focused on him and he thought he saw hope flash through them but it was gone quickly as it had come.

His voice penetrated her thoughts, his tone was concerned almost caring, but he wouldn't act like that if he knew the whole story. Lord she'd killed his mother, not that she regretted it but the thought of him finding out right now, especially at her weakened state was horrifying. Who knew what he'd do to her? Probably finish Christophe's job of suffocating her. That's why she must lie, that's what she did best after all, taking a shaky breath she answered him in what she hoped was a nonchalant tone. "Only wondering why you're sitting next to my bed, in my bed chambers, looking like you haven't slept a wink." It wasn't a complete lie but she was avoiding the question.

Her answer made sense except it didn't, surely she remembered what'd happened the previous night. Of course that didn't explain why he was still in her chambers, "Well I might as well start from when I heard you scream." He watched her reaction, she shifted a little uncomfortably before nodding. "Well I was on my way to my chambers when I heard you scream, instinctively I went to see what was going on. When I came, I have to say it was not what I expected at all yet I wasn't surprised either. _Christophe_ was holding you against the wall, you were already unconscious so I naturally thought you were dead."

"Oh _thanks_." She interrupted, voice dripping with sarcasm, in reality she was trying hard not to squirm with nervousness.

He ignored her comment and continued, "Anyways, once he realized I was in the room he dropped you, you hit your head on the desk." At this she raised her hand to her forehead and then winced and quickly taking it away. "I took my sword out on him, but he had his over you so I couldn't strike him. He left and I dealt with your forehead but then you stopped breathing and for a moment just a moment I thought you were dead. Then some miracle occurred and your heart started up again, you were quite shaken so…er..well you kinda…well I mean I guess you could say we were hugging." He said sheepishly "You finally fell asleep." _In my arms_ He added mentally "I was going to leave but I realized Christophe could come kill you in the night so I stayed, and…yep here I am." He finished. She simply nodded but seemed unnaturally skittish, "By the way why did you conceal the killer's identity when you knew all along!? While he killed innocents!" His tone was suddenly dangerous and he wasn't sure if he was imagining it but he thought he saw her cower on the bed.

She knew he was going to get there eventually and of course when he did he would turn off his kindness. She suddenly felt a spark of alarm and as a rabbit in the glare of a fox would cower down, trying to look smaller, less of a threat. When she answered she was dismayed to hear her voice shake "He was securing my regency."

He suddenly felt extremely enraged by her "You let innocent people die to secure your regency?! Your power?!" He had risen from his seat at this point and she instantly looked so small, huddled on the bed.

"I tried to make him stop killing, I let him do this to me." She gestured to her neck.

"Oh how very noble of you!" He sneered. "Now come to think of it there's something else I've been meaning to ask you about, I've sent my mother letters and she hasn't responded to a single one. Care to explain?!"

She was openly terrified now, he was towering over her and she was pressing herself against the opposite wall, she had nowhere to go, no escape. At the mention of Diane though, she threw caution to the wind "She's with her dear lover, my husband your father!" Her voice was filled with remorse and spite.

"Where is she, my mother deserves a proper burial!" Anger was engulfing his senses and it almost gave him pleasure to see she had no escape.

"Her body's in the sea." She spat.

He let out a scream of anger and then he had clambered across the bed until he had a knee on either side of her thighs, trapping her against the wall. Their eyes met for a split second, both filled with pure agony and remorse for each other. She had killed his mother and always made him feel like an outsider, never equal. He had caused her so much pain by being the first born to her husband and Diane was always more loved by Henry. Without warning he grabbed her already sore and sensitive neck, tightening his hands around her smooth skin. How good it felt to have all the control, to feel her breaths instantly become a challenge.

She wasn't surprised and she didn't struggle, she probably deserved this but she didn't feel any regret towards what she'd done to Diane. She'd killed her babies, stole her husband, and outdid Catherine in everything in Henry's eyes. She raised her eyes to meet Bash's, a challenge and her hands went to his chest in attempt to push him off not breaking eye contact for a second. As hard as she pushed he was too strong for her and her air supply was running out quickly. As she felt the familiar fuzzy blackness pressing in she gripped the collar of his shirt "I avenged my babies murderer and now your avenging her, I guess we're all murders in the end." Unexpectedly he took his hands from her throat like she'd burned him. Air flowed into her lungs and without the support of his hands on her neck she slumped sideways curling up in a ball, shaking and panting.

He wasn't surprised that she fought back and was immensely pleased that she was failing, he grabbed a fistful of her hair wrapping it around his arms pulling it tight. She raised her gaze to meet his, her eyes matched his fury. A dark evil flame flickered in the depths of her challenging him, she could never forgive his mother for what she'd done. She'd taken Catherine's husband, killed her twins and always been Henry's favorite her loath for his mother was eternal. His fingers were ready to steal the life away from her, as she had done to his mother when she spoke. The truth of it all, was it really worth it? He would've done the same thing if his children had been killed. She was a mother avenging her murdered children, how could he blame her for that? He released her and she collapsed unexpectedly so vulnerable and she shook, rocking herself whilst holding her knees to her chest. Tears spilled down her cheeks and suddenly he felt a pang of guilt, all she'd done was protect her children and look what she'd been through. He reached to touch her but she pressed herself impossibly closer to the wall "No don't touch me!" She cried though her tears.

She could trust no one, not Henry, not her children, no one. Everyone shamed her for her ways but she wasn't born a cold hearted killer, _they_ had done this to her. The soldiers in Florence, Henry, Diane, her own children yet she had stayed with them and why?! For the sole reason that she was their mother, wife, queen there was no escaping and now it was over for her. Bash would ruin it all tell them all of her sins she would lose it all again. Sobs escaped her lips and hot tears dripped down her cheeks off her chin and stung her neck. As she saw him reach towards her she shook even more uncontrollably trying to shield herself. "Go! Please just go! Ruin me tell them all have me locked up just don't touch me!" She begged.

"Catherine I'm sorry I…I mean you killed my mother but she killed your children your babies. They were defenseless and she did it out of jealously. I won't hurt you I'm sorry." It was true, no he would never forgive her for what she'd done but he didn't want her to fear him either. "I can't leave you like this.."

She couldn't stop her trembling and her voice quaked "You won't hurt me really?! REALLY?! You almost murdered me! This is what breaks me, _lies_ all the false hope and traitors. Can't you see?! I'm so corrupt, fighting for all the wrong reasons. It's all because of you! It's your fault you and your damned mother and father! No one's ever held me in their arms not my mother not my husband no one. No one's ever loved me no one has ever thought me worthy of anything! Do you ever wonder why I'm such a villain? I wasn't born broken! Can no one understand?! YOU BROKE ME YOU ALL KILLED ME!" She screamed at him "I'm dead." Her voice was reduced to a whisper.

He gazed at her in utter shock, when she finally fell silent he lay down next to her and drew her into his arms. He was surprised when she didn't object just buried her head in the crook of his neck. "Just tell me what you need." He whispered, he came to the realization that she needed comfort, love, fixing.

As she felt his strong arms pull her to him she couldn't object all she wanted was to be held, if he killed her at her weakest fine. She could care less at this moment, so she settled her head next to his so she could feel his warm breath on her ear. When he asked her what she needed she said the first thing off the top of her head "Just hold me." She whispered.

Her simple request made his stomach twist in sadness for her, she was like a small child who'd been scared by a bad dream. She was terrified and deeply wounded and as he held her she began to calm, her quivering concluded until she was tranquil. True she was sweaty and disheveled but he didn't mind what she needed right now was comfort and that's what he would give her.


	3. Crimson Scars

**Hi guys, sorry last chapter was rather violent but it had to be done, anyways I just wanted to say that Catherine hasn't lost her spunk it'll be coming in this chapter. I just had to write her without the sass for the last two cause idk seemed better. Please review Thanks!**

She had no idea why he was comforting her after all she'd done to him. Millions of thoughts whirled through her mind, what if someone found them like this? Did she have something important going on today? Where was Christophe? Why did she suddenly want to feel his lips against hers? NO Catherine get a hold on yourself, it's just because you're desperate right now you don't want him to kiss you. She took a deep breath into his chest and then looked up at him and suddenly they were inches apart. "Why are you still here? If your intention is to kill me once I fall asleep or alert Charles and Claude so they personally murder me go straight ahead but don't do this to me. Don't hold me close and tell me lies then go out to destroy me and everything I hold dear once I'm immobilized. I told you I can't take people who betray me…" She was cut off by Bash.

Her words proved his suspicions correct, she had lost all sense of trust, all her innocence. It dismayed him to hear the ache in her voice how her eyes looked so much bigger looking up at him with what she called 'false hope'. As she spoke her breath hit his face, and it pained him to know how very little she trusted him. He didn't want to be rude but he couldn't take it anymore "Catherine! Catherine, shhh I'm not going to hurt you I'm going to be right here until you want me to leave. I'm going to help you."

She was surprised when he suddenly cut across her and even more shocked to see the sincerity in his eyes. She took a breath and slowly nodded "I should probably get ready," She sighed "I have a privy council meeting later today and a party needs to be planned for the arrival of a cousin he's really rich." She added. Though she made no motion to move. Her neck felt like it had been scorched but from experience it would feel better in a day or two.

As she told him about what she had to do the old Catherine snapped back into place as if she hadn't been pouring her soul out the other minute. He nodded in agreement before sitting up and then getting off the bed while straightening his vest. Even though they'd just ridden an emotional rollercoaster neither seemed fazed by the fact they had been tightly embracing one another a few minutes before. He planned to check up on her after dinner that is if Kenna didn't hold him up.

She sighed before getting out of bed she looked fairly unruly with her hair mussed up around her face. Her nose was puffy and rosy as were her eyes, which were also a bit bloodshot. She sniffed once before going over to her wardrobe and selecting a dress and setting on her bed. When she turned she came nose to nose with Bash, her breath caught in her throat was he going to hurt her? He had his arms around her for a split second before releasing her "Take care of yourself." He told her before exiting the room.

She was left standing there, shocked and cheeks glowing. Maybe he wasn't as bad as she'd always thought, but then again he could be shouting all that she'd told him all over the castle at this very moment. She groaned before asking her ladies to make her up a bath. When the bath was ready she settled into it, why hadn't she thought of this last night? Oh yeah…she was being murdered twice, her hollow laugh bounced off the tile walls.

After her bath she went to dress, it was a silver and black patterned material with a high collar. She smoothed it down and set a black crown atop her bun of auburn hair. Looking at herself in the mirror for a moment she straightened her stance and opened the door. She marched into the throne room with renewed authority and confidence. No one looked at her oddly or really paid her much mind other then to bow or ask about the party preparations. Bash hadn't spilled her secrets all over French Court…yet.

The day seemed to be going fine when it took an unwanted twist. She was attending to a noble and his grain when Mary pulled her aside. Catherine was at first angered until she saw the expression on Mary's face, "Mary dear what's wrong?"

"Catherine…how could you keep this a secret?"

"Keep what a secret? Mary what are you…" Before she could finish the young Queen had slightly pulled open the neck of her dress. Catherine gasped and slapped her hand away, cheeks pink and eyes wide.

"Mary!" She hissed, "What do you think you're doing?"

"I knew it! He hurt you."

"You knew what? Who hurt me?" She asked, trying to sound innocent.

"Bash! He hurt you."

Well, she hadn't seen that coming, "What? No…no Bash didn't hurt me, these are old." She mumbled feeling very awkward having this conversation with the Scottish Queen.

"Don't lie Catherine, these are fresh…plus you've been fiddling with the collar of your dress for the last few days."

"Mary, Bash did not hurt me I swear to you."

"Then who?" Mary asked, "Did you ask them to? Did they force themselves on you? How long ago was this? Yesterday? Today? Was it Narcisse?!"

"Shhh." Catherine hissed, "No, no it wasn't Narcisse, I did it to myself…" She lied.

"Don't lie you would never do this to yourself." Mary frowned, "Why are you lying to me?"

"I…Mary it's hard to explain, listen this isn't the time." Catherine tried to side step the Scottish Queen but she grabbed her arm.

"Catherine if you don't tell me the truth I will blame Sebastian and imprison him."

"You wouldn't!"

"I would and I will." Mary stated.

"Why would you even suspect Bash?"

"For one you two aren't exactly friends…you killed his mother." Mary lowered her voice at this, "Plus I saw him run to your chambers last night and I heard you screaming, I was going to see what was going on but…err…well I preoccupied." Mary blushed.

Catherine shook her head, "It wasn't Bash."

"I'm giving you one last chance Catherine."

"Fine, fine it was Christophe."

"Did he force himself on you? Or did you ask him to? What's going on Catherine?"

"Mary, please don't push me I'm not feeling well but it won't happen again."

"Catherine de Medici I swear to you, I am coming to your chambers tonight _with_ Bash and if I don't get an explanation we're going to have a problem! Am I understood?"

Catherine nodded and Mary stormed away, leaving the elder Queen to stare after her in shock. Oh they had a problem alright, she strode into the throne room where she found Sebastian and boy if looks could kill. She grabbed him by the arm, dragging him away from a group of confused villagers. "What the hell?!" She nearly shouted once they reached deserted corridor.

"What do you mean?"

"Mary just pulled down the collar of my dress is saying that you hurt me. I told her you didn't but now she's having you and her meet in my chambers and lecture me. What did you tell her?"

"I didn't tell her anything I swear."

"Oh yeah right! How'd she know then?!"

"I don't know! You ask her!"

"I did!"

"You're impossible!" He stormed away.

She stormed in the other direction back to her chambers. Something creaked and she looked up, the secret passageways. Taking the gleaming dagger off the desk she crept into the darkened passageways. The scowling face of Christophe met her at the doorway, sighing rather dramatically, "Oh it's you again."

"Yes I came to finish what I started." He hissed withdrawing his sword.

"Don't bother." She glared, "If you kill me you'll be right behind me."

"Yes, yes I know you've told your blue eyed bastard boyfriend Bash." He taunted.

"He's not my boyfriend!" She retorted.

"Good otherwise he might miss you."

"Trust me I won't be missed…" With one swift movement she removed the dagger from behind her back and stabbed him in the stomach "Because I'm not going anywhere."

He gagged and fell forward crashing into her before she had time to move. The shining blade of his sword sliced her wrist as it fell to the ground. She hissed in pain and tried to shove him off her but it was no use. Struggling to call out or alert anyone of her situation she felt the crimson liquid from her cut pooling around her wrist and she felt a bit woozy. Calling out again and again she could only hope someone found her in time. Letting the looming blackness envelop her mind she slipped from consciousness.

 **A/N I'm sorry for the** ** _extremely_** **short chapter but I'm on an all time dry for this story. Hope it wasn't too bad but don't expect any more updates any time soon (sorry again).**


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